NannyMUD Times issue February 1998

[Polar]

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 1    ---
 
             Meanehwael, baccat meaddehaele / monstaer lurccen
             Fulle few too many drincce / hie luccen for fyht.
             Den Hreorfneorhtthhwr / son of Hrwaerowthheororthwyl
             Aesccen aewful jeork / to steop outsyd
             Phud! Bashe! Crasch! Beoom! / De bigge gye
             Eallum his bon brak / byt his nose offe
             Wicced Godsylla / waeld on his asse
             Monstaer moppe fleor wyth / eallum men in halle
             Beowulf in bacceroome / fonecall bemaccen waes
             Hearen sound of ruccus / saed "Hwaet the helle?"
             Graben sheold strang / ond swich-blaed shcharp
             Stond feorth to fyht / the grimlic foe
             "Me," Godsylla saed / "Mac the minsemete."
             Ond flyng him lic frisbe / bac to fenhalf-nelson
             Beowulf belly up / to meadehalle bar
             Saed "Ne foe beaten / mie faersom cung-fu."
             Eorderen cocca-colha / yce-cold, the reol thyng.
 
 
  Welcome to the February 1998 issue of the NannyMUD Times.

  (1) Index
    This. No more.
  (2) Announcements
    Events from the past month in the mud.
  (3) Interview
    With Iceblink and Kiki, full of fun and interest for the whole family!
  (4) Playerquestion
    You'll never go wrong underestimating the taste or intelligence of the
    general public..
  (5) Puzzles from January   
    The solutions to last month's crop of confusion.
  (6) Puzzles for February
    A new set of prizes to be earned.
  (7) Weddings from January
    Those who tied the knot.
  ( Recipe, courtesy of a new regular contributor
    Courtesy of Marthastwrt.
  (9) Firelight's drunken binge
    Here's a side of him you rarely see.
 (10) Area review
    Courtesy of Thaadd.
 (11) Pklog
    Yay, Virgin.
 (12) 'To Defend Or Not To Defend'
    Courtesy of Leclerk.
 (13) Historical Knights
    Courtesy of Grimault.
 (14) Letter to the editor
    A complaint from Morb.
 (15) Letter to the editor
    A rebuttal from Cathbad.
 (16) Parting comments
    Typical tripe.
     

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 2    ---
 
 
 Nannymud hung at 00:30 the night of 980116.  It was rebooted the morning
 after the admin noticed it was down.
 
 Sovereign's area opened.  Did players dare brave the horrors that lurk in
 his temple?  Some lurked under his table, but only found admin there.
 
 Kittens closed temporarily, but returned "within soon", according to
 Dwinbar.
 
 Kairi's area opened at the bottom on the sea, south and some east from the
 village jetty.  The area is suitable for newbies and lower-level players,
 which exclude all of Kairi's seconds.
 
 For those of us with an addiction and absolutely no willpower whatsoever,
 the admin have created a 'block_login' command to help us stay away from
 Nanny.  Rumor has it that rather than censure or demotion, admin will force
 a block_login of one to two years.  Direct all complaints to the NannyMUD
 Times.
 
 Bixby's area returned under the control of Bixby, the Duke of Westport. 
*Press return for more or q to end. >
 Gaia reopened Quant's area, but for some reason, it doesn't give five
 thousand gold coins per monster any more.
 
 
 And another month of events has come and gone.
 
 

[Polar]

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 3    ---
 
**  We're here with Iceblink and Kiki, the subjects of the February 1998
    interview.
**  For those who don't know you very well, what can you tell us about
    yourselves?
 
Iceblink says: well, hmm... I started playing nanny in may of '94... Kiki
               started in March... but she started as Jifse
Iceblink says: This is my original character... I was a monk
Kiki says: I used to be a druid
Iceblink says: I wizzed quite some time ago... twice, due to a crash... and I
               was an idle wizard, not doing anything, for a long time
Iceblink says: Kiki wizzed soon after we got together in real life
Iceblink says: on July 7, 1995
Kiki says: actually there was a little crash that erased my wizzing
Iceblink says: We got married irl on September 13, 1997
Iceblink says: we now have an open area and quest too!
 
**  So you met on the mud and then got together in real life?
 
Iceblink says: we didn't really spend much time together on the mud actually
Iceblink says: that's how we knew OF each other
Iceblink says: but we actually met at Gabrielle's first mud party in Chicago
Iceblink says: though we didn't spend much time there either
Iceblink says: that was the spring before we got together
Iceblink says: I actually became interested in Jifse when she posted a note on
               the adventurer's guild board about something to do with medieval
               studies...
Iceblink says: it also didn't hurt that I found out she lived only an hour away
               from where I lived at the time
Iceblink says: I found out that she was home for the summer and calling long
               distance to Pennsylvania to get on the mud
Iceblink says: most of the time, I have 2 or 3 internet accounts... so I let
               her use one of the ones I just had as a backup
Iceblink says: so I don't know... maybe that's when she became interested in me
Kiki says: I told him to come visit me where i was, but he said there was more
           to do in Chicago so I should come visit him
Kiki says: So I did
Kiki grins evilly at Iceblink.
Iceblink says: yup... she took the train, and I met her at Union Station
Iceblink says: you want to hear more about this? or?
 
**  Go on, tell us all about your courtship.
Iceblink says: ok
Iceblink says: anyway, I picked her up at Union Station, and we grabbed a cab
               to Water Tower (a tourist attaraction that has a lot of stuff to
               do around it)
Iceblink says: for some reason, we decided to walk along Lake Michigan instead
               of hanging out there
Iceblink says: so we started walking along the beach... and I found a very
               oxidized penny in the sand... I figured it might be a lucky
               penny... so I picked it up... and kept it
Iceblink says: and I now wear it on a chain around my neck
Kiki smiles happily at Iceblink.
Iceblink says: seems I was right about it
 
**  Aww.
 
Iceblink says: so we walked a ridiculously long way...
Iceblink says: hehe... that's what most people say
Iceblink says: and we went to the Lincoln Park Zoo
Iceblink says: we walked and walked and went to dinner at my favorite chinese
               restaurant
Iceblink says: she got a fortune cookie that said something like, "Look to the
               person across from you for love"
Iceblink says: something like that... something that made me sound good
Iceblink says: then we went to pick up my computer which had just been upgraded
               to a 486! woooooo!
Iceblink says: so that was the beginning of our relationship
Kiki giggles merrily.
Iceblink says: anything to add honey?
Kiki says: that sums it up
 
**  What's your area and quest like?
 
Kiki says: The quest is based on Chaucer's Canterbury Tales
Iceblink says: heh, he hasn't asked that yet
Kiki says: well the quest and area are the same basically
Iceblink says: oh jeez... never mind
Iceblink says: I spammed myself and missed the question
Iceblink says: sorry!
Kiki laughs.
Kiki says: he's a nervous typer
Iceblink says: The quest is based on Chaucer's Canterbury Tales
Iceblink snickers.
Iceblink says: I had actually been working on the area and quest for a really
               long t
Iceblink says: time
Iceblink says: at least a year...
Kiki says: he had the skeleton of the area set up when I wizzed
Iceblink says: it was stagnant because my coding ability can not actually be
               described as an ability... more like a coding disability
Iceblink says: but I was trying
Iceblink says: and I really wanted this area
Kiki says: enter Kiki!
Iceblink says: then kiki came along... and she caught onto coding more quickly
               than I ever could
Iceblink says: I had the area and the idea in my head... the whole quest,
               pretty much, was mapped out on paper
Iceblink says: there is so much code from other people in that quest... beldin,
               avis,
Iceblink says: Snafu even
Iceblink says: everybody helped... but Kiki's the one that really put it all
               together
Iceblink says: the area itself is pretty accurate
Iceblink says: there were some players from Canterbury on here for awhile... I
               don't remember their names... they were quite impressed
Kiki says: we researched descriptions
Iceblink says: It's definitely a quest that can be done without a quest sheet
*Press return for more or q to end. >
               too... but these days, everyone seems to use them...
Iceblink says: Halamer was the first mortal to solve it with no prior knowledge
               of the quest
Iceblink says: but Sambar playtested it for us
Iceblink blinks icily and licks you.
Iceblink says: kiki's right... we did do a lot of research for the area's
               descriptions
 
**  Do you have any planned expansions to your area?
 
Iceblink says: hmm... well, mostly wiz stuff
 
**  Are there any other projects you're working on?
 
Iceblink says: yes
Iceblink says: well... it's hard when I can't code
Iceblink says: but we have some ideas
Kiki agrees.
Iceblink says: the preliminary docs for our guild were approved
Iceblink says: we got the go-ahead to start working on it... and Kiki did
Iceblink grins sheepishly.
Iceblink says: I'm mostly an idea man

Iceblink says: and she expands my ideas, makes them even better, and makes them
               a reality
Kiki says: sometimes
Iceblink says: often
Kiki says: need a little encouragement too
Kiki says: and help
Iceblink nods.
Iceblink says: the amount of time it's taking is mostly my fault...
Iceblink says: but I think we'll get it done eventually
Iceblink nudges Kiki suggestively and says 'don't you?'.
 
**  What can you tell us about the guild?
 
Kiki grins evilly at Iceblink.
Iceblink says: hmm
Iceblink says: well, it is definitely nothing like anything even seen on the
               mud before
Iceblink says: s/even/ever
Kiki says: started from a joke...
Iceblink says: actually... that's true
Iceblink says: as did the lepers
Iceblink says: I was talking to bix about it one day... joking... and it made
               us laugh... he never thought it would ever happen... but I
               started working on it
Iceblink says: well, thinking about it anyway... powers etc
Iceblink says: the guild will be a lot of fun...
Kiki says: we hope
Iceblink says: I'm sure it will be
 
**  Just like all guildmasters are.
 
Kiki chuckles.
Iceblink says: hmm... I don't know about that
Iceblink says: because I am really trying to make it fun... and funny
Kiki says: there's actually a number of jokes within our quest that I think a
           lot of people overlook
 
**  Are they funny only to those who've read Chaucer?
 
Iceblink says: not at all
Iceblink says: for some of them, a little Latin doesn't hurt...
Kiki says: you do need to examine the characters
Iceblink says: but they're strewn all over the area
Iceblink says: the jokes, not the characters... well, the characters too
Iceblink says: a lot of people  seem to think you need to know about chaucer
               to solve the quest... that's not true
Kiki says: Chaucer was also a tongue-in-cheek kind of guy
Iceblink says: a lot of people think you need to know Middle English to
               understand anything
Iceblink says: that's not true either... many people on this mud, not only
               those who don't speak English as a first language, have a hard
               enough time understanding modern english...
Iceblink says: I wouldn't do that to people
Iceblink says: poor kiki is hard at work
Iceblink sighs.
Iceblink says: hehe, she should leave
Kiki says: Iceblink misses me
Iceblink nods.
Kiki says: and our kitties
Kiki smiles happily.
Kiki kisses Iceblink and you.
Iceblink grins evilly.
Kiki says: bbl
Kiki left the game.
Suddenly Iceblink's wedding ring goes dark.
**  You were married on September 13, 1997?
 
Iceblink says: Yes, here in Naperville, IL
Iceblink says: a nice, small wedding... about 60 people were there, I believe
Iceblink says: Including Leclerk and Lourdes
Iceblink says: I wish we could have invited more people from the MUD
 
**  You should have made it a mudparty.
Iceblink says: for awhile, we thought we were going to have too many people
               there
Iceblink says: that would have been interesting
 
**  What can you say about the concept of the guild?
 
Iceblink says: It's just like all the other Kittens guilds on other muds
Iceblink says: just kidding
Iceblink says: well, I'll go ahead and let it out of the bag... that way we're
               foreced to work on it
Iceblink says: the guild we are creating is the Guild of Simpletons
Iceblink says: all the other guilds on nanny are based on what great powers
               they have... and all the great things the players can do
Iceblink says: our guild is based on all the great powers we don't have... and
*Press return for more or q to end. >
               all the great things we can't do
Iceblink says: simpletons just don't fit in too well with the rest of the
               mud...
Iceblink says: the Simpletons are for the Simyarin who forgets all but the
               simplest of spells... for the Champion of Khorne with an
               attention deficit disorder, Vampires who never learn to like the
               taste of blood... Adventurers who always seem to get lost...
 
**  So their strength is that they lack strengths?
 
Iceblink says: basically, yes
Iceblink says: they're simpletons
Iceblink stares blankly and picks his nose.
 
**  That's about it from us.  Any final comments from you?
 
Iceblink hmms.
Iceblink says: sure...
Iceblink says: 1. If you're going to do our quest, try it without a quest sheet
               first...
Iceblink says: 2. Marry a girl or guy from the mud... you know you'll always
               have at least one thing in common
*Press return for more or q to end. >
Iceblink says: or you could be like us and have a trillion things in common
Iceblink says: if you're a wizard, spam the wizline often
Iceblink says: and never be afraid to offer a good friend a HOWDY DAMNIT!!!! or
               call him/her a putz
Iceblink says: oh... Kiki's not home yet... you'll need a comment from her...
 
**  What a putz.
 
Iceblink says: "I love Iceblink! He's WONDERFUL! I couldn't be happier"
Iceblink says: I'm sure that's what she'd say
 
**  Of course.  Thanks for your time.
 

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 4    ---
 
Lonewolf tells you: Hm, what echoall do you think I should do for this
         month's playerquestion?
 
Gothick tells you: ???
Nothel tells you: that is a good one
Orcryst replies to you: uhm.
Chromium tells you: what is everyone's views on pk?
[-Druids-] Shandra tells you: no idea
Hesson replies to you: hehehe thought that was the echoall
Fuzzie tells you: im not so sure, whats it about?
Kingen tells you: hmm, let me think about it one min
Isobel replies to you: dunno..
Iceblink tells you: hehe... how about asking that exact question in an echoall
Orcryst replies to you: I dunnop.
[Simyarin] Shanta tells you: Which is the best Roleplaying Game
Hera replies to you: hmm, no clue actually
Hesson tells you: or was it
Chakaal tells you: "Which is the flappiest guild of them all?"
Pollux replies to you: sorry, i cant scroll back... repeat please
Isobel replies to you: don't you use tellall?
Jifse tells you: silly or serious?

Xero tells you: Who killed harry.....shrug...heh
Lys tells you: hmm..lemme think
Charisma tells you: hmm...
[Simyarin] Moss tells you: where did you first get laid?
Spuhling replies to you: wHat?!?!??!?!?!
Kefka tells you: how about that one.
Iceblink tells you: or favorite food...
Falkenstein tells you: I don't know maybe let's rock
Jifse tells you: Do you think Bill Clinton should do the porn movie?
Killenian tells you: I am not sure what an echoall is..
Hemkoep tells you: uhm.. try "Lonewolf tells you: Hm, what echoall do you
        think I should do for this month's playerquestion?" ?
Charisma tells you: Which admin is the most doable?
Kingen tells you: Something like: what area and quest do you like the most ?
Hera replies to you: if you were given a choice of 1 now forbidden feature,
     what would you want the admin to allow/
[-Druids-] Oak tells you: hmmm
[-Druids-] Oak tells you: thinking
Charisma tells you: and why
Sheena tells you: ummmm have no idea:)
Vincent replies to you: favorite quest?
[Simyarin] Moss tells you: jk, hmm thinking
Iceblink tells you: who would they like to see as the next admin?
Pollux replies to you: well ?
[-Druids-] Brujah tells you: Hmm. Shit. You're the editor (racks her brain)
           Something about mudparties? where what who something like that?
Pearl tells you: echoall???
Silencer tells you: maybe, which guild you like best and why ?
Chakaal tells you: Or _was_ that your playquestion?
[Simyarin] Moss tells you: what were some of the other ones?
Iceblink tells you: "just how much DOES Iceblink rock?"
Leclerk tells you: tell banshee When you make your herring, do you add the
        parsley before or after you added the cream?
Kingen tells you: or: What is the best part with playing a mud?
Kingen tells you: I don't know really
Gabe tells you: 'Hmm, what echoall do you think I should do for this month's
     playerquestion?' perhaps?
Zalagadonka replies to you: What would you do if a wiz wanted to give you a
            q-help sheet... ha ha ha
Leclerk tells you: oh, man!.. wrong tell.. i feel to stupid!...
Xero tells you: or the one that you just used on everyone? *grin*
Kefka tells you: echoall Lonewolf tells you: Hm, what echoall do you think I
      should do for this month's playerquestion?
[-Druids-] The trees sigh as Chromium departs this world.
Gabe grins evilly at you from a long way away.
[-Druids-] The trees whisper happily: Chromium the greater druid is here.
Iceblink tells you: "which girl has bigger breasts?  Fortunato or Barbarella?"
[-Druids-] Oak tells you: if you could give anyplayer a chastitybelt (aka:
           mudsex curse) who would it be?
Iceblink tells you: how're those?
Chakaal tells you: Prod.
Zalagadonka tells you: dont get me bansihed for that... 
 
Lonewolf shouts: About a third of you caught on. Thanks for your replies etc.
 
A blowkiss suddenly appears and kisses you affectionately.
It lands directly on your right cheek!
The kiss feels like it came from Lys's lips.
A blowkiss suddenly appears and kisses you affectionately.
It lands directly on your chin!
The kiss feels like it came from Xero's lips.
Aqua tells you: sorry what did you say
Hesson tells you: DAMNIT! I thought I was special to you! not just another
       one-question stand!
Brujah tells you: Huh? hey!
Isobel tells you: heh.
*Press return for more or q to end. >
[-Druids-] Oak tells you: damn, i was wodnering if you were doihg that.
Iceblink tells you: hehe
[-Druids-] Oak tells you: ass!
 
 

[Polar]

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 5    ---
 
  The following are the puzzles and solutions from the last issue.
 
 
 
 The man who sold it did not want it.
 The man who bought it did not need it.
 The man who used it did not know it.
 What is it?
 
  Prize: 500 coins.
 
   Devron was the first with the answer of 'coffin'.   
 
 
 What can go up a chimney down but not down a chimney up?
 
  Prize: 500 coins.
 
   Cathbad was the first with the answer of 'umbrella'.
 
 
 What number comes next?
 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 20, 22, 101, ?
 
  Prize: 1000 coins.
 
 Series:  The next number is 1010.  The series is the representation of 10 in
 base 10, 9, 8, etc.  (The real question is -- what comes *next*?)
   Bixby was the first to answer this.
 
 
 What is the product of the following series:
 (x-a),(x-b),(x-c),.....(x-z)? (really nothing for math oriented minds)
 
  Prize: 1000 coins.
 
 The product of (x-a)..(x-z) presumably includes (x-x)
 and therefore, is zero.  Cathbad was the first to answer this.  Bixby and
 Sexcrime earned honorable mentions.
 
 
 In a hardware store, you ask the price of an item on
 display. Practically every hardware store carries this item, for no
 home should be without it. The following conversation takes place.
 Clerk: The price is a quarter each.
 Customer: That means seventy five cents for 100.
 Clerk: That's right.
 Customer: Well, I'll take fifty seven.
 Clerk: That will be fifty cents.
 
 The conversation makes perfect sense. What is the item?
 
  Prize: 2000 coins.
 
 The item is a number to place outside your house. 100 = three numbers =
 75 cents.  Devron was the first to answer this.  Cathbad, Bixby, and
 Sexcrime earned honorable mentions.
 
 
 You are given nine trees and must arrange them so you have ten lines of
 three trees each.
 
  Prize: 5000 coins.
 
  Devron was the first to answer this, with a solution of:
 
  there are 9 trees a-i
   set up like this:
 
 a     b
    c
 d  e  f
    g
 h     i
   
   and the ten lines are these
 1=acf
 2=bcd
 3=adh
 4=bfi
 5=ceg
 6=def
 7=beh
 8=fgh
 9=aei
 10=dgi
 
*Press return for more or q to end. >
   Hallon earned an honorable mention.
   
 
 
 You are at the bottom of the sea and notice something strange, you can
 breathe under the water. There's a lot of seaweed here. You stand in front of
 a cave, it looks dangerous, but tempting to enter. There's some text carved
 into the cavewall.
   There are two obvious exits: east and north.
 
  Prize: 5000 coins.
 
    Oriole was the only one to find this room, with a path of:
    w,2s,e,enter mirror,n,w,n,e,3n,6w,n,dive,w, 21 steps.
 
 
 The following is the roomhunt from November 1997.
 
 This is a small, ruined chamber with a low ceiling. Once mosaics must have
 covered all the walls, but now most are ruined from years of moisture and
 temperature changes. Only a few are left. At the west end of the chamber is a
 simple altar.

   There is one obvious exit: up.
 
   As added incentive to explore the mud, the prize for this room
   has risen to 10000 coins.  This is the last month this prize will remain
   available, after which it will be retired to the Hall of Fame.
 
 Jass found this room, much to the chagrin of the staff of the Times, with
 a path of 3w, 5n, e, n, dig center.
 
 
>
> read page 6
You read page 6 in your newspaper.

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 6    ---
 
 
 With six toothpicks, make four equilateral triangles.
 
  Prize: 1000 coins.
 
 
 In the basement of your house are three light switches that control three
 light bulbs upstairs.  If you can only flip two switches, how can you
 tell which switch controls which bulb?
 
  Prize: 2000 coins.
 
 
 Place a knight anywhere on a chessboard.  Move the knight according to the
 rules (two squares in one direction, then one to either side) and step in
 every square on the board only once.
  (Treat the board as being numbered 1-8 horizontally and A-H vertically
   when describing your solution.)
 
  Prize: 2000 coins.
 
*
 
 A cow is placed into a circular pen and tethered to a post, located on the
 side of the pen.  If the cow stretches his tether to the limit, he can
 graze on exactly one half of the area of the circle.  What is the ratio of
 the length of the tether to the radius of the circular pen?
 
  Prize: 5000 coins.
 
 
 The following is the roomhunt for February 1998.  The prize is awarded to
 the player who identifies the quickest route to the described room without
 using teleport or movement-enhancing items.
 
 Light pours in through a curtain of water providing scant illumination for
 the cave mouth. The cave is really just a narrow fissure in the rock but
 there are signs that it is inhabited...dead gnawed sheep carcasses are strewn
 about the cave.  Hopefully, whatever ate them won't be home... The cave
 continues into darkness.
   There are two obvious exits: out and northwest.
 A grotesque fomorian.
 
  Prize: 5000 coins.

[Polar]

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 7    ---
 
 Another thirteen marriages last month, and twice as many divorces.
 It has been determined that marriage is the primary cause of divorce.
 Stay single.
 
 
Kimberly was married to Sentinel by Snafu Fri Jan  2 07:54:50 1998
Yin was married to Yang by Eertvee Sun Jan  4 10:10:13 1998
Milan was married to Grim by Grim Mon Jan  5 15:22:05 1998
Taz was married to Oozone by Ferrodor Wed Jan  7 10:07:59 1998
Decebal was married to Roq by Nothel Fri Jan  9 16:05:33 1998
Phade was married to Juliette by Bowen Mon Jan 12 02:35:59 1998
Iver was married to Wanessa by Iver Wed Jan 14 17:54:15 1998
Jolrael was married to Magenta by Nothel Mon Jan 19 14:16:02 1998
Jolrael was married to Magenta by Nothel Mon Jan 19 14:16:02 1998
Demone was married to Windmachine by Sovereign Wed Jan 21 11:24:58 1998
Sebell was married to Mazrim by Hawkie Thu Jan 22 03:05:05 1998
Rasheka was married to Yass by Leclerk Fri Jan 30 18:18:31 1998
Syla was married to Bloodlord by Gabe Sat Jan 31 19:55:19 1998
 
 
>
> read page 8
You read page 8 in your newspaper.

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 8    ---
 
It's a Good Thing
  by Marthastwrt
 
The wonderful thing about fruit salad is its versatility and simplicity.
My favorite salad requires no measuring, no searching markets for that
strange looking fruit you've never heard of, no fancy dressings, no fuss.
Best of all, it provides nearly infinite variety. Use your favorite
combination of fruits, fresh or canned, local or imported, it's up to you.
Clean the fresh fruits and drain the canned. Cut them into bite-sized
pieces, if they're not bite-sized already, and mix them in a bowl to serve.
I prefer to chill my salads a little ahead to be served cold and let
flavors blend a little. You can add dried fruits, nuts, fresh or dried
berries, or coconut in any combination that pleases you. No dressing is
required but for an easy change try your favorite flavored yogurt. Be
imaginative and take your inspiration from where ever you can find it...
or just go ahead and give the following recipe a try.
 
Newbie Island Tropical Fruit Salad
 
Cut up the flesh of the following chilled fruits:
  1 mango

  1 papaya
  1 guava
 
into bite-sized pieses. Mix them in a bowl. Slice in 2 ripe bananas and toss
gently. Serve in individual portions on a bed of fresh leaf lettuce
and sprinkle a little coconut on top. Garnish each dish with fresh
mint leaves and one macadamia nut halved. (garnish optional).
 
Serve immediately.
 
Throw a party with a tropical theme. Try making a decorative
center-piece with sea shells and colorful feathers perhaps draped with
a beautiful lea or some pretty jungle vines. Be creative and have fun.
 
It's a good thing.
 
 
>
> [Explorers] Narya leaves on an expedition to RL.
read page 9
You read page 9 in your newspaper.

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 9    ---
 
Firelight tells you: og <00:08>
Firelight tells you: whats the fithsth spell? <00:08>
Firelight tells you: suck 6th spell <00:08>
Firelight tells you: fuck i meamn <00:08>
[Simyarin] You told Firelight: No one knows but me.
[Simyarin] Firelight tells you: uou tell me ! <00:09>
[Simyarin] You told Firelight: And the translation of that: I will not
           tell anyone, because if anyone knows, then that means I told
           someone.
[Simyarin] Firelight tells you: bah! <00:09>
[Simyarin] Firelight tells you: tell me! <00:09>
[Simyarin] You told Firelight: You drunken Brit.
[Simyarin] You told Firelight: Spell antidisestablishmentarianism.
[Simyarin] Firelight tells you: dear god I'm so fucked <00:09>
[Simyarin] You told Firelight: And then pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanocon
Firelight tells you: dear god I'm so fucked <00:10>
[Simyarin] You told Firelight: laugh hard
Firelight tells you: i hurt all over <00:10>
 
 
Firelight says: is almost unconcous
You say: Keep talking.
Firelight says: i cant
You say: Hey, you can. What did you drink?
Firelight says: i can hardly sprfek ;0
You say: Did you go drinking with Readis?
Firelight says: cicer
Firelight says: no, with Albikozza
You say: Cider? You got drunk off of cider?
Firelight says: the original albi
You say: Oh, come on. I can drink that like it's water.
Firelight says: yeah:)
Firelight says: i drink a lot of cider
Firelight says: i dont like lager
You say: So how much did you drink?
Firelight says: a lot
Firelight says: pints and pijnts
Firelight says: 7-8
You say: Ten? Twelve? Twenty?
Firelight says: or somethjin
You say: Oh, only 7?
You say: You weenie.
Firelight says: you fuclkiong yank
Firelight says: you cant drink
Firelight says: i know
You say: Oh?
Firelight says: i heard from horn
You say: I limited myself to a half dozen julebrygs because I had to get up
         the next morning.
You grin.
Firelight says: s o therer
Firelight says: yeah yeah
Firelight says: yeah right
You say: Horn was drunk.
Firelight says: light wite
Firelight says: fucking brits rock drinking
You say: Wait - wait - I think I get it - the fact that you almost drank
         yourself into a coma means that you're better than I am?
Firelight makes some magical gestures.
Firelight says: YEH!
Firelight says: urgh
You say: Really?
Firelight says: i gell ill]
Firelight says: its all going hazy
Firelight says: i feel ill
You say: So the MIT freshman who drank himself to death is the coolest guy
         around?
Firelight says: drinking is importntant touu know yo9u useless yank
Firelight says: DRINK DRIDKD DRINK
You say: It is? Why?
Firelight says: because it is
Firelight says:
You say: Just how wasted are you?
Firelight says: get elwoj in here
Firelight says: leowon
You say: Elwoj?
Firelight says: leowon rocks
You say: Yeah, but he's not a drunkard.
Firelight says: the bugger gave me a curse
You say: Because you're drunk.
Firelight says: i can type is if i concentrate
You say: You're embarrassing yourself.
Firelight says: ssort of
Firelight says: nof
Firelight says: nod
Firelight says: sickeninglyu true
You say: You're sloshed.
Firelight says: sadly true
Firelight nods sadly.
You say: You're tanked.
Firelight says: i think i need to go home and sleep
You say: You're bombed.
You say: Do you think you'll remember this conversation?
Firelight vomits eveywhere.e
Firelight nods solemnly.
Firelight says: i always rememebnr
You say: You sure?
Firelight says: just got to die seomwhere
Firelight nods solemnly.
Firelight says: i  will remember
You say: Why don't you go lie down and sleep?
Firelight says: log log log
Firelight says: log lgo lgog loglgo  og
You say: I'll make sure you remember.
Firelight says: tou cunt P:))
Firelight giggles merrily.
You say: Beg pardon?
Firelight says: yo8u got to get into the UK swearrig scene
Firelight says: swearing scene

You say: I can't read what you're writing. It's illegible.
You say: Jonny, go lie down and sleep this off.
Firelight says: you need to get into the UK swearing scne
Firelight says: nod that
Firelight says: i think i need to go home
You say: Yes.
You say: Go home.
Firelight says: its sall going grey
Firelight snuggles you.
You say: Don't forget to stop and tiddle on a wall with a bobby looking on.
Firelight giggles merrily.
Firelight says: probably
You say: GO.
Firelight says: i just talk to cymraeg first
You say: You're too drunk.
You say: I'll dest you in ten seconds, then you go home, okay?
Firelight says: give me 2 mins
You say: Okay.
You say: You have two minutes.
Firelight nods solemnly.
You say: Now go talk to Cymraeg.
 
 
 
[Simyarin] Firelight enters the reality.
Firelight tells you: my head
You told Firelight: laugh
Firelight tells you: i dimly recall speaking to you last night.
 
 
What a guy.

[Polar]

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 10   --
 
 Starting this month, I will be doing a running feature of an area review
 column.  Any wizards who are interesting in having their area featured
 should send myself or Lonewolf mail, including directions on how to
 get there.
 
This months entry is Padrone's area (6 west, 2 south, one east, south)
One of the oldest areas around, this area has quite a variety of things
to see and do.  There are several useful services provided, such as a free
Surgeon to change your gender, a BodyGuard Hiring service, and for confused
mudders everywhere, Eliza the Psychologist.
 
There is a ticket required that you can buy at the main gate for 20 coins,
or perhaps find scattered about Lars Town. Padrone coded several quests
before he moved on, of varied difficulty levels, which are as follows:
 
  Help Sir Obliterator in his evil work (15 points, by Brom and Padrone)
  A tree has fallen across a path (20 points, by Padrone)
  Find Padrone's walking castle (25 points, by Padrone)
  Help the Secret Police with the Chaosdemon (81 points, by Padrone)
 
While unfortunately there is no booklet on them in the tourist office,
there are few auto attacking creatures, so most lower level players need
not fear poking around. The size of Padrone's is quite respectable and only
his mirrormaze might be confusing, but to a player familiar with it, it
allows fast movement throughout the mud.
 
I tried to interview a variety of people on Padrone's, and came up with
these general results...
The Surgeon was thought to be the most useful service there, with a
trickster named Eddie in a close second. Being both free and fast, Surgeon
is an asset doing gender bending quests and for helping round out your
character with a short description.
       
Overall, people liked the quests. Only one person remarked that they
disliked a re-code feature, which disallowed people from doing a quest
repeatedly.
With regards to Padrone's overall coding creativity, all of the wizards
sampled were pleased. Barbarella went as far as to say  "...assuming it
survives the seemingly endless parade of re-codes, I think Padrone's will
remain a model of what a good area can consist of.."
 
For kills, people disagreed on the quality. Some folks polled said that it
was lacking, others specified that it was "good for a Khorne".
 
All in all, people liked Padrone's, and expressed wishes that the area
remain, despite the absence of the coding wizard. I wish to thank the
people who took time out to allow me to interview them; Agbane, Alainysi,
Barbarella, Crono, Reece, Orcryst, Talando, Tmo, Yunnie and likely a few
others who I can't remember the names of. If you'd like to join a elite
cadre of area snoops, mail me, and I'll tell you the name and directions to
the current month's choice, as soon as it is chosen.
        (a few quotes here)
 
"TOK TOK TOK"
  --Alainysi, Wizard
"Bring back the old sub-machinegun!"
  --Crono, Gallant Knight
"I like that walking castle can be done by people of all levels..."
  --Orcryst, Master of Flowers
"I don't take issue with that particular example of non-fantasy items
mostly because Padrone's area has a certain legendary status in my mind -
it's one of the first areas I spent lots of time exploring, and it is one
of the original core areas of the mud"
  --Barbarella, Wizard
             
 
  //Thaadd
 
 
> read page 11
You read page 11 in your newspaper.

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 11   --
 
You are in a large open grassy place just south of the village church, which
dominates the scene. The main village lies over to the east to the west is
a hump-backed bridge crossing a wide river, and beyond that untamed
wilderness.
Ingis Lane starts here and leads off south.
The morning sun is rising in the east.
There are four obvious exits: west, east, north and south.
Coke the fighter of Khorne (neutral).
Kimberly's hunting falcon.
Kimberly the Exalted Knightess (good).
Golgol the master druid (nasty).
Doa the grand druid (TreeHugger).
Saga the Toag (neutral).
Dabot the Master of Khorne (demonic).
Stjarna the utter novice (neutral).
Spunkybutt the Daemon Prince of Khorne (nasty).
A dead oak tree.
A lane leads south from here.
(Virgin)[2000} Golgol says: wimp yyrkoon..=)
Golgol burps.
Demonblade says: YOU WILL BE SURPRISED, VIRGIN, OF HOW LARGE PART!
Kimberly neatly puts a nice bandage over Dabot's nasty wounds.
Yunnie arrives.
Yunnie leaves north.
There is no yunnie here.
(Virgin)[2000} No Yunnie here !
(Virgin)[2000} Lorca arrives.
Lorca leaves east.
Dabot leaves east.
Kimberly leaves with her falcon east.
Ender arrives.
Yyrkoon arrives with his falcon.
Golgol grabs some spores from a leather pouch and hurls them at Yyrkoon!
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol.
Dabot arrives.
Kimberly arrives with her falcon.
Teel arrives.
Ender leaves east.
Golgol slashed Yyrkoon in the chest.
Yyrkoon misses Golgol completely with a misdirected blow.
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol.
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol in the chest.
You missed.
Yyrkoon nicked Golgol in the stomach.
You smashed Yyrkoon with a bonecrushing sound.
|** Yyrkoon is in superior shape.
Yyrkoon's falcon scratches Golgol in the face.
Golgol grabs some spores from a leather pouch and hurls them at Yyrkoon!
k
Saga starts pointing out the weak spots in Yyrkoon's defense.
Yes, yes.
(Virgin)[2000} Hungrig arrives.
Yyrkoon waves a wand of fireballs and you are hit by a fireball.
|** BP: 282/344
Golgol missed Yyrkoon.
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol in the chest.
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol.
Saga continues pointing out the weak spots in Yyrkoon's defense.
You smashed Yyrkoon with a bonecrushing sound.
A powerful lightning is released from the sword.
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol.
Saga continues pointing out the weak spots in Yyrkoon's defense.
You grazed Yyrkoon.
|** Yyrkoon is in fair shape.
Golgol grabs some spores from a leather pouch and hurls them at Yyrkoon!
fDabot thinks carefully.
Golgol slashed Yyrkoon in the chest.
Yyrkoon's sword releases a powerful lightning.
Yyrkoon misses Golgol completely with a misdirected blow.
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol in the chest.
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol.
Saga continues pointing out the weak spots in Yyrkoon's defense.
You smashed Yyrkoon with a bonecrushing sound.
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol in the chest.
Saga continues pointing out the weak spots in Yyrkoon's defense.
You smashed Yyrkoon with a bonecrushing sound.
|** Yyrkoon is in very weak shape.
Demonblade says: OF COURSE, I DO NOT EXPECT YOU TO UNDERSTAND THE FINER POINTS!
|** BP: 255/344
You gaze deep into Yyrkoon's eyes, holding him in place.
(Virgin)[2000} Golgol grabs some spores from a leather pouch and hurls them at Yyrkoon!
Yyrkoon's falcon flies home.
Golgol nicked Yyrkoon in the stomach.
Yyrkoon slashed Golgol.
Yyrkoon tried, but failed to run away.
Yyrkoon chops a slice out of Golgol.
Yyrkoon cut Golgol lightly.
Saga continues pointing out the weak spots in Yyrkoon's defense.
Party: Experience points divided.
[PKersinfo] Virgin just killed Yyrkoon.
You are victorious!!!
[PKersinfo] From somewhere deep inside the temple you hear a voice saying:
Hail Virgin!!!
Yyrkoon died.
|** Golgol is in poor shape.
The mist left the game.
You can't when there are things in the backpack.
The backpack will not let itself be put into the backpack.
Couldn't put the backpack.
backpack cannot contain robe.
Couldn't put the robe.
backpack cannot contain ring.
Couldn't put the ring.
backpack cannot contain wand of fireballs.
Couldn't put the wand of fireballs.
backpack cannot contain focusing crystal.
Couldn't put the focusing crystal.
You put an orb, a sharp black longsword, a rune armour, 5421 coins, a wand of
healing, a mirror, a crucifix and pair of metal gauntlets in a backpack.
(Virgin)[2000} The wind blows Golgol's spores back in its face!
Golgol puts a robe, wand of fireballs, a ring and a focusing crystal in a
backpack.
gaSaga continues pointing out the weak spots in Golgol's defense.
You smashed Golgol with a bonecrushing sound.
Saga continues pointing out the weak spots in Golgol's defense.
You missed.
|** Golgol is in very weak shape.
c
 
You take a backpack from a corpse of Yyrkoon.
(Virgin)[2000} Yunnie arrives.
Yunnie leaves north.
There is no yunnie here.
(Virgin)[2000} No Yunnie here !
(Virgin)[2000} l
Saga continues pointing out the weak spots in Golgol's defense.
You smashed Golgol with a bonecrushing sound.
Saga continues pointing out the weak spots in Golgol's defense.
Party: Experience points divided.
[PKersinfo] Virgin just killed Golgol.
You are victorious!!!
[PKersinfo] From somewhere deep inside the temple you hear a voice saying:
Hail Virgin!!!
Golgol died.
|** BP: 344/344
You slowly drain corpse of Golgol of all blood.
You are in a large open grassy place just south of the village church, which
dominates the scene. The main village lies over to the east
to the west is a
hump-backed bridge crossing a wide river, and beyond that untamed wilderness.
Ingis Lane starts here and leads off south.
The morning sun is rising in the east.
There are four obvious exits: west, east, north and south.
A withered husk.
A backpack.
Kangaroo gloves.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
A fortune cookie.
Dauron's field chainmail.
A black amulet.
A pair of black boots.
A lovely springflower.
The ring of truth.
The giant king's heavy twohandsword.
40090 gold coins.
Corpse of Yyrkoon.
Hungrig the Master of Autumn (lonely).
>Teel the Acoustic Warrior (neutral).
Kimberly's hunting falcon.
Kimberly the Exalted Knightess (good).
Dabot the Master of Khorne (demonic).
Coke the fighter of Khorne (neutral).
Ghost of Golgol.
Doa the grand druid (TreeHugger).
Saga the Toag (neutral).
Stjarna the utter novice (neutral).
Spunkybutt the Daemon Prince of Khorne (nasty).
A dead oak tree.
A lane leads south from here.
(Virgin)[2000}
 
 
 Tsk, tsk, there go the knights.
 
 
>
> read page 12
You read page 12 in your newspaper.

[Polar]

To defend or not to defend.
===========================
 
We have heard rumours about a new tribe of playerkillers lurking
around in Nannymud. Those rumours told us that these playerkillers
were very skilled and powerful. They call themselves
'defenders of camelot' and belong to the guild of knights.
The rumours say that their powers are way superiour any other
guilds.
 
We sent out our investigating reporters to the scene to see if
there is any substance at all to these rumours.
 
First of all, we discovered that a more suitable nickname for
these 'defenders of camelot' is 'defenders of the church' since
they spend much more time inside the village church than in the
battlefield.
 
Second, it is actually true that their powers are way superiour
any other guild, but for some reason these 'defenders' seem to
have a hard time using their powers in the correct and most
skilled way, since most of the time they are the ones running
with their tail between their legs from the battles.
 
Finally we would like to present the hardcore proof of the
lack of skills these 'defenders' have.
 
This months killed 'defenders'. (Jan02-Feb01)
----
Eleven killed       whiner    (knight) Fri Jan  2 01:51:13 1998
Snuttegumma killed  seego     (knight) Sat Jan  3 21:42:00 1998
Murmandamus killed  delekhan  (knight) Sat Jan  3 22:00:41 1998
Snuttegumma killed  phade     (knight) Sat Jan  3 22:28:08 1998
Virgin killed       yyrkoon   (knight) Sun Jan  4 05:10:15 1998
Snuttegumma killed  yunnie    (knight) Thu Jan 15 04:42:26 1998
Christie killed     perrin    (knight) Sun Jan 18 00:19:44 1998
Christie killed     yunnie    (knight) Tue Jan 20 00:31:10 1998
Skrog killed        seego     (knight) Fri Jan 23 16:16:52 1998
Unholy killed       yunnie    (knight) Fri Jan 23 18:20:41 1998
Mayar killed        yunnie    (knight) Tue Jan 27 17:46:52 1998
Yass killed         phade     (knight) Fri Jan 30 14:20:14 1998
Christie killed     whiner    (knight) Sun Feb  1 01:53:26 1998
Christie killed     pendragon (knight) Sun Feb  1 02:23:12 1998
Snuttegumma killed  yunnie    (knight) Sun Feb  1 02:33:26 1998
Unholy killed       ripples   (knight) Sun Feb  1 03:04:10 1998
Christie killed     pendragon (knight) Sun Feb  1 03:19:06 1998
---
 
This gives us the toplist of killed 'defenders':
1. Yunnie 5 times.
2. Whiner 2 times.
2. Pendragon 2 times.
2. Phade 2 times.
2. Seego 2 times.
6. Delekhan 1 time.
6. Yyrkoon 1 time.
6. Perrin 1 time.
6. Ripples 1 time.
 
Top 'defender' killer this month was: +++ Christie +++
*Congratulations*
 
>
> read page 13
You read page 13 in your newspaper.

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 13   --
 
 -== KNIGHTS TRIVIA ==-
 
   by Grimault
 
This is not related to the game at all. It's just a compilation of historical
trivia. There are probably blunders in the text. My excuse is that it was
written in great haste.
 
"Now God forbid," Roland makes answer wroth,
"That living man should say he saw me go
Blowing of horns for any Paynim foe!
Ne'er shall my kindred be put to such reproach.
When I shall stand in this great clash of hosts
I'll strike a thousand and sev’n hundred strokes,
Blood the steel of Durendal shall flow.
Stout are the French, they will do battle bold.
These men of Spain shall die and have no hope."
- The Chanson de Roland
 
        Beginnings
 
Knighthood as we know it started to develop from its early stages, when
knights were fighters rather than noblemen, in the 12th century. Feudalism
was simple enough to begin with. There were lords obeying a king and
mustering groups of fighting men to defend their fiefs. The whole structure
of warriors rested upon the backs of the hard working peasants they were
supposed to protect. The training and equipping of a Lord's men was mirrored
in an ethos developed directly from earlier Germanic warrior societies. The
concept of chivalry grew from a simple warrior's code, which above all
stressed loyalty to the warleader, prowess and courage, to a sophisticated
system of values such as personal integrity, duty to defend the weak from
oppression, practice of knightly virtues such as largesse (generosity), pite
(compassion), franchise (a free and frank spirit) and courtoisie
(courtliness, especially to women). The ideals of knights were described in
romances such as the "Ordene de Chevalerie," and chansons de geste sung by
wandering jongleurs who toured from castle to castle, particularly in
southern France. In the 13th century church stepped in and ritualized
ceremony of knighting, which already had started to formalize in the
preceding century.
 
        The peak
 
Europe was in the 13th century dominated by power struggles between
over-powerful nobles and their feudal overlords, and saw a drastic
restructuring of the European kingdoms. There were naturally many examples
of behaviour to be imitated from history and myth. Arthurian romances, such
as "Parzifal" and "Yves, le Chevalier de Lion" by Chretien de Troyes, were
popular throughout the whole medieval period. The Nine Worthies were
historical figures who were considered to be the greatest examples of
chivalry - Alexander the Great, Julius Caesar, King Arthur, Charlemagne,
Godefroi de Bouillon (leader of the First Crusade), and sometimes Richard
the Lionhearted, were counted among these.
 
        When and what in arms and armour
 
In the 11th century the mail shirt was refined to a knee-lenght hauberk,
sometimes supplemented by leggings and mittens of mail. The late 11th
century saw a development of the charge with couched lance, which was to be
the basis of knights' military supremacy. A lance-charge with couched lances
(gripping the shaft of the lance near the blunted end - it was a longer
spear, really - and held tightly to the side).
 
In the late 12th century the great helmet, sometimes called the Crusader's
Helmet, started to be used instead of the bowl-like helmets inherited from
Norman times. From as early as late 12th century the great helm was fitted
with a crest. This perhaps served two functions; firstly it allowed knights
to display their martial magnificence, and secondly it provided means of
identification (since the helm was completely closed and heraldry was in its
earliest stages). In the beginning of the 13th century pennons and
free-standing devices appeared. Helmets developed further and knights
started using steel cups on knees and elbows. The 14th century saw some
plate armour, most importantly knights started using coats of plates (cloth
garments with leather or metal plates sewed on), and later solid
breast-plates. The helmet developed into a bascinet with aventail
(mail cape). In the 15th century full platemail armour appeared. At the end
of the century Gothic armour was developed. German smiths were particularly
famous for crafting these. But, by now gunpowder and rifles had started to
become so common in the battlefield that armour had outlived itself. Nobles
and kings continued to dress in armour for state occasions such as parades,
though, into the late 17th (and in some cases even the 18th) century.
 
        War
 
In the 13th & 14th centuries it became more difficult for kings to maintain
feudal armies in the field. Equipment and horses were too expensive. It
started to become necessary to pay knights in coin or tempt with booty to
be looted. Later Middle Ages saw the knight as an adventurer more often than
earlier, since he had developed into a mercenary and had to support his
expensive way of life. War also became uglier. The 13th century is perhaps
most famous for the chevauchees of the Hundred Years War, in which groups of
knights roamed the countryside pillaging, plundering, raping and killing as
they saw fit. This hit-and-run form of guerilla war was very effective. The
lord lost all income and couldn’t defend himself. Unfortunately enough for
the peasantry and burghers this most often meant that chevauchees continued
unopposed. France soon looked even worse than later during WW1. The century
saw the formation of "free companies," unemployed soldiers who at the end of
a campaign always was on the lookout for a new paymaster. If they didn't find
one they lapsed into brigandage. One famous group of this kind is White
Company under Sir John Hawkwood, so called because they used to polish their
weapons and armour (!).
 
Death on the battlefield was unusual. Most knights died during sieges, either
from festering wounds or (more commonly) sickness. A custom of ransom soon
developed, where important knights was captured and held hostage rather than
executed. Even during the crusades Muslims and Christians exchanged hostages
for ransom.
 
        Women
This is really a far too interesting subject for this summary article. It is
often believed that women had very low stature and no control over their own
destiny during the Middle Ages. This is not necessarily true. Their situation
improved greatly in the 12th century, partly because of the wide popularity
of romances (that praised women) and the birth of knightly virtues. It
happened that women went to war, dressed up as men. A few of these women
were discovered late into campaigns, having fought side by side with men
form months, and were sent back home with regret by the commanders. Women
Cathars played an immensly important role in the development of this parallel
christian faith, and the women of Languedoc were generally powerful and
self-sufficient. Among the most famous and influential women are Queen
Eleanor of Aquitaine and Empress Matilda (12th century), Joan of Arc (14th),
Countess Beatrix of Die (a famous troubadour), Marie de France (a celebrated
poetess), Hildegard of Bingen (an abbss, writer and visionary of the 12th
century).
 
 
>
> read page 14
You read page 14 in your newspaper.

[Polar]

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 14   --
 
 
This mud needs an enema.
 
Once there was a generally lighthearted attitude towards the
players and lesser wizards about, but not any more.  And even
though it has become cliche, I have to blame it on the admin.
Before it was assumed all the players were trying to exploit
bugs, all the non-coding wizzes were a bunch of no-good
layabouts, and that the admin should try to keep their needs
and desires in mind to make things more enjoyable for
everyone.
 
Recently the admin have taken the (admittedly correct) attitude
that this is _their_ mud, and they will do with it as they
please, regardless of the players' collective reactions.  What
they are forgetting is without players this is just a bunch of
code with them to tinker with instead of a game.  I've gotten
the feeling that some of the present and recent admin have this
attitude.
 
If cornered on the issue, most admin will either joke about it
or offer the same argument they've been offering for the past
couple years, almost word for word: "If the mud is getting worse,
why are there more and more players?"  I relate this to the
American tobacco companies saying "If smoking is so awful for
you, why are there more Americans smoking now than 50 years
ago?"  The answer, ofc, is that the market has grown, and that
generally uneducated people are happy with what they are given
at first.
 
Approximately two years ago was, in my opinion, when the mud
started losing its appeal.  Coincidentally, this was boomtime
for the internet, with more and more people, especially the
students that make up much of the mud-population, getting
online.  So while the old guard leaves because the quality of
the mud has sunk drastically, a new, bright eyed group of
players are introduced to it by trying it out randomly, hearing
of it from less jaded friends, etc.  Since the market is growing
so quickly, any well established mud will also experience great
growth, regardless of its actual quality in relation to other
muds (RL example: people still buy hundreds of thousands of
Packard Bell computers, even though they are significantly lower
quality and no cheaper than other brands.  Why?  Name
*Press return for more or q to end. >
recognition, stupid friends with PBs and nothing to compare it
to offering recommendations, and good marketing, like Nanny
being based on a high-traffic university computer system.)
 
The aforementioned layabouts and do-nothings put up with this
since they aren't really affected by the changes, and are
probably too lazy to protest anyhow.  The players are upset,
but feel powerless.  They are hardly encouraged to use boards or
praises, and the few that do quickly realise that it rarely, if
ever, leads to change.  Eventually old players and wizards look
for new haunts.  Every time this happens, the average quality
and intelligence of the mud drops.  This will continue until
you, or I, or somebody does something about it.
 
I doubt anyone ever will (successfully).
 
Morb.


---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 15   --
 
Morb wrote most passionately about the decline of Nanny in last month's
Times.  His passion has persuaded me to write in reply.
 
Morb opined that the admin have, in recent times, taken the attitude that,
as this is their mud, they will do with it as they please.  I wouldn't
dream of calling that anything but truth.  However, I would point
out that it is far from the whole truth.
 
The admin have always done with Nanny as they please, there has been no
grand revelation in this.  As for the player's reaction?  What is best for
Nanny may not always be what is best for an individual player.  The admin are
in a position to take a wider view of what is necessary and act upon it. 
The players, on the other hand, often consider things from a rather more
personal viewpoint.  I am not suggesting ignoring opinions, simply
noting that popular opinion and necessity are not always reconcilable.
 
As for the argument "If the mud is getting worse, why are there more and
more players?"  I can't comment on that.  I've never heard a single admin
use that argument.  Nor am I particularly acquainted with the senses of
humour amongst the admin.  I've been looking for them for aeons and so
Morb's revelation that the admin joke when "cornered" was rather a shock
for me.
 
Any system must change to survive and Nanny is not an exception to this
rule.  Clearly, the admin must be the agents of this change. 
 
As people remain on a changing system they develop a sense of a "Golden Age".
This tends to lead to seeing the past through "Rose Coloured Spectacles"
and thus leaves the player or wizard jaded with the current situation.
 
Certainly, Morb's rationale for the growth of a mud should be given
credence.  However, that only explains how people find Nanny.  Perhaps the
question should be "If the admin are doing such a bad job, why do people
stay?"
 
 
Cathbad
 

---------------------- The NannyMUD Times --------------------- page 16   --
 
 
 Another month come and gone.
 
 The typical response to that feedback page from the last issue was "The
 paper is great, but don't bother to wait for pages from other people." In
 accord with popular demand, the paper will not be delayed waiting for
 submissions from other people.
 Of course, it'll be delayed waiting for submissions from me, which was the
 cause of the ten-day delay.
 
 Kudos to those who contributed, and shame on those who criticized without
 contributing.  And, of course, a blushing apology to those who criticized
 and contributed.
 
 Snug woo, one and all.
 
 //Lonewolf, editor-in-chief
 
 
>
> read page 17
But there are less pages than that!

> w
Elm Road <e n s>.
This is Elm Road. You are walking in a north-south slope with old elms
flanking you on both sides. Behind the trees old houses hide. South is the
village and to the north Elm road crosses a small square.
An elegant iron gate lies open to the east.
  There are three obvious exits: east, north and south.
A group of people.
> drop paper
You drop a newspaper.
> e
A luscious lawn <e w>.
You are upon a cobblestone path leading between the street and a grand old
house. Luscious grass grows on either side of the path, shaded by large old
elms. It feels very peaceful here. You can go east, up the porch of the old
house.
  There are two obvious exits: east and west.